Like you, dear Reader, I have skimmed impatiently through Salty Bob’s latest overnight missive, my eyes resting briefly on the subject header ‘I CAN DO THIS FOREVER – THE CHOICE IS YOURS’.
Like you, dear Reader, I have put all thoughts of this ridiculous creature with the name of a cartoon character out of my head.
Like you, dear Reader, I want my coffee.
I open my office door.
There, brandishing an industrial office stapler, stands Salty. Salty glares at me, mutters, and scuttles back into his shell room.
Dear Reader, I continue towards the Happy Taizhou Happy Burger Café for my morning coffee, pausing only to slip a note under Salty’s door reminding him of his forthcoming PDR with me on Monday.
Just as I have reached the end of the corridor, dear Reader, I hear a terrible caterwauling.
It is Lu-Seal, Deputy Under-Janitor, singing to herself as she does her morning rounds with mop and bucket.
As I do, I see Lu-Seal’s mop handle catch the underside of Salty Bob’s article, which has now been enlarged to A2 size, and is decorated with a hand-drawn border of anchors and sailors’ knots.
Lu-Seal mops vigorously.
The article is torn from its place, industrial staples notwithstanding.
It falls, wafting from side to side, until it comes to rest in Lu-Seal’s mop bucket, and sinks under the bubbles.
Lu-Seal picks up her bucket and disappears round the corner.
Dear, dear Lu-Seal, I think to myself. Such a diligent mopper.
It is people like her that make a University tick.
*Professional Development Review.